Multitudes on Monday (February 27)

#47

Hearing someone’s smile when you can’t see it **.

The voice rises, exudes excitement and warmth. This sound makes me well up with joy, makes me want to smile back.

#48

A glass of cool, refreshing water. Quenches the thirst, washes the body of impurities.

#49

Making my own soap! The smell of lemon verbena, stirring the creamy goodness.

Lovely!

**The person I specifically have in mind is a woman named Lisa Grace Byrne of WellGroundedLife. She has a wealth of information & inspiration for moms and non-moms alike. Every time I watch one of her videos or listen to an interview she’s conducted I can’t help but smile! Her voice expresses her emotions, you can really tell when she’s smiling…a gift that she gives to others.

RIP

I’m laying this good ole machine to rest. Due to an unfortunate circumstance with a glass of water a couple months ago my beloved MacBook is now ready for the grave. Apparently the couple drops of water that leaked through the keyboard has “infected” my computer like a mold…corroded it. Somehow the hard drive has been spared though!

I had a bit of a hard time immediately after the “diagnosis” but then I realized (thanks to my wonderful husband)…you know what? God is in control, He’ll take care of me, I’m not taking this silly computer to heaven!

This might, of course, impact how often I post here but hey, it’ll be okay!

Blessings!

Anger…

has a stronghold on my heart and it has for some time. Why? I am finally coming to terms with this but, really it’s quite scary. I’m finding out things about myself that I probably didn’t want to find out…I’ve repressed so much.

Am I really angry or is this a mask for the fear that I feel?

Scared that I’ll be rejected for who I am, scared that I won’t be loved, scared that who I am isn’t acceptable, scared that I will be abandoned. All this fear in my soul started at a very young age, I’m sure. I could go places with this that I really don’t want to, so I won’t. Who am I to blame any one person for this? It is, what it is. We are all sinners, we all have our fears and insecurities.

This is who I am but who’s to say that the Lord can’t change my heart? That process is also frightening and a vulnerable place to be.

I am angry that I am constantly being demanded of…I’m scared that I won’t be able to give what needs to be received.

I am angry when I don’t get time to myself to be myself…I’m scared that who I am won’t be listened to or will be flat-out rejected.

How do I get over this?

Pray.

Lord, this place that I’m coming from is not a happy place…not right now. Help me to see that only You can truly change my heart, that You aren’t out to get me. Help me to see that You love me, cherish me just the way I am; that You won’t reject me; that You are always listening to me even when I’m not making much sense to myself. Help me with my anger, my fear and use these emotions to somehow better my relationships and further Your Kingdom.

Amen.

Related articles

• Temper, Temper (dadvotionals.com)
• ANGER – Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr (theheadnotthetail.wordpress.com)
• righteous anger (rebekahshope.wordpress.com)
• Letting Go of Anger (jesuszen.wordpress.com)
• My Spirit Rejoices! (mrsmisenheimer.wordpress.com)
• A Comforting Anger (ragamuffinalexis.wordpress.com)

Walk with Him Wednesdays: Fasting

(Every Wednesday, we Walk with Him, posting a spiritual practice that draws us nearer to His heart. To read the entire series of spiritual practices
This week, and the next two weeks, as we walk with Him towards Easter, might we consider: The Practice of Fasting. We look forward to your thoughts, stories, ideas….–Ann Voskamp)

I knew today was Ash Wednesday; our church has been talking about the service they will hold tonight. I have probably even taken part in an Ash Wednesday service sometime in my past, but I realized…do I really know what it means, what it is? It marks the first official day of Lent…a season of repentance, fasting. I’m sure there are misconceptions…it’s only a “Catholic thing” might be one. People all over Twitter are “tweeting” about what they are going to give up for Lent…chocolate, drinking, sugar, Facebook, etc. Do those people really know why they’re giving these things up? Is it a mindless ritual? Is it a personal feat to overcome? Is it the “popular” thing to do? I’m just speculating here, no accusations, no judgement…just wonder.

I would consider myself a “baby Christian,” having been saved about 8 years ago. I feel like I have some much to learn, so much to read, so much more to experience.

Is our observance of Lent just a tiny speck of sand in comparison to what Christ experienced those 40 days in the wilderness and later on the cross? How does giving up chocolate even compare to the torture Jesus was put through? We can live without chocolate, can we live without Christ? It’s all symbolic…dying to our earthly desires, possessions, lives so we may be resurrected with Jesus.

I am human and a sinner. It is possible to give up those things that I covet…such a strong word, but I’m being truthful. Do I want to give up those things…probably not. Did Jesus want to die on the cross? I don’t know…I’m going to venture out on a limb and say no, but He did and He did it for us.

So, I am willing to give up those things that I feel have a strong hold on me in this current season of my life…I know I’ll look at the words and feel that I am such a shallow person…this is nothing compared to the wilderness.

• Starbucks
• Soda
• Desserts
• Holding grudges, not forgiving
• Putting up a fake front…everything is okay

Related articles

• Prayer for Wednesday (Ash Wednesday) (yourdailyprayer.wordpress.com)
• Ash Wednesday 2012 (mumbailaity.wordpress.com)
• Ash Wednesday (frstephensmuts.wordpress.com)
• Season of Dust (www.rzim.org)

The Man in the Corner

I sit there, exhausted, worn, maybe a bit sad, a little angry. Still thinking about how our last few days has gone…kids fighting, feeling overwhelmed. And then, I look over…

And elderly man with a worn body. Hands open, ready to receive, giving thanks, praising, singing. His eyes are closed, a gentle smile on his face. A tear runs down mine.

I can only imagine what this man has seen in his lifetime. Friends and loved ones come and go. Children born and leave. Hope, grief, excitement, love, sadness. And yet, here he is…years and years into his lifetime with this frail body and his once strong hands still receiving, still praising, still singing!

The Lord has been good to him, He has been good to me in showing me this believer…showing me that all things are possible in Him.

Related articles

• Keeping Open Hands (housefullofbookworms.com)

{this moment}

{this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

If you’re inspired to do the same, leave a link to your ‘moment’ in the comments for all to find and see.~Amanda Soule

Joy Dare (from February 15)

In continuing on with Ann Voskamp’s Joy Dare…counting 1000 gifts in 2012. She posts dares for everyday of the month…3 per day. Here is February’s.

a gift in losing something…

#33

Gracie held on tight to that mylar balloon, the whole way through the grocery store. She was patient while her siblings shed tears and screamed, and still she held on tight. The wind was blowing when we stepped outside, all five of us being blown by the gusts. Still she held on tight. We made it to the car, loaded ourselves in, buckled up. The minute she let go her heart floated out the door. My reaction time was way too slow, all I could do was watch as it taunted me and floated into the heavens. It’s with God now, I told her…wrong words! The tears began to roll down her face, devastated. In that instant I knew exactly how she felt, hopeless, sad, heart heavy…I’ve been there. All I could do was embrace her little body, give her my heart and wipe her salty tears. A gift.

a gift in finding something…

#34

The infamous “found” keys!! I had a mommy brain fart one afternoon while picking up Gracie from school. We were walking to the car, keys in hand, unlocked the car. Somewhere, somehow the keys had vanished! I honestly thought I was losing my mind (not the first time). I looked everywhere, scanned the parking lot multiple times, unloaded the whole car (and cleaned it!). It took me a couple months…one day while unloading the littlest one I happened to lift off the car seat cover and lo and behold….the keys!! This really shouldn’t have been cause for a breakdown those previous weeks but it was! God had a reason for this…to increase my trust in Him!

a gift in making something…

#35

A precious baby, only 17 weeks gestation, still enveloped in her mother’s womb left to be with the Lord. Her mother shed so many tears, tears dropping on her baby girl’s tiny fingers as she held her for the last time. Women that had known this mama (while only through an online support group of sorts) shed tears as well and out of those tears a beautiful quilt was born…a reminder to this mama of this precious angel…a gift to her and all those who touch that quilt.

Related articles

• February’s Joy Dare … Three times I heard laughter today … Three gifts found in working. (blackwidow12.wordpress.com)
• February’s Joy Dare … Three things overheard … (blackwidow12.wordpress.com)
• February’s Joy Dare … Three gifts found behind a door today … (blackwidow12.wordpress.com)
• The Joy Dare – For February (blackwidow12.wordpress.com)
• February’s Joy Dare … Three gifts found when bent down … (blackwidow12.wordpress.com)
• Joy Dare February Week 2 (neverpictureperfect.wordpress.com)
• God’s Daring Plan (nicolewhitespeaks.com)

with Him Wednesdays: The Practice of Love

Walk with Him Wednesdays

“Every Wednesday, we Walk with Him, posting a spiritual practice that draws us nearer to His heart.

(The Practice of Love How do we love in difficult places? Our husbands? Our children? How do we live out the greatest of commandments? We look forward to your thoughts, stories, ideas….)”

(For the Next 3 weeks:  The Practice of Fasting What does it mean and what does it look like and how does God use it to change us? We look forward to your thoughts, stories, ideas….)”–Ann Voskamp

Tell Him…

I’m going to take a guess at what my guy wants more than anything…

financial freedom?

a new house?

a vacation?

Probably all those things, but if I know his heart I would say that he wants me to tell him…

how much I love him,

that I still find him incredibly attractive,

my conversations with God,

my heart.

{I believe this is not only Mark’s desire but also the Lord’s…tell Him}

He holds the tiniest of hands, leads them to safety, gives them comfort, wipes the tears, embraces with tenderness, plays with reckless abandon, feeds them {body & soul}.

He holds them when they are tired of walking, he picks them up when they fall down.

He shows them the beauty around them, he marvels at the wonder with them, he tries his best to answer their questions.

He has delivered one of our babies with his own hands!

He does all this without a second thought, without expectations.

For all of these things I love him! Our heavenly Father does all these things too, and while Mark could never be as perfect {no one can} he is constantly striving. He is striving to know the Lord, striving to be more like Jesus. And for this I love him!

 I may not have the words all the time; my heart “thinks” in pictures, moments, memories, actions…these are the things that explain my love for him.

Related articles

• Practicing Infinite Love (joyofspa.com)
• Persevere in Love (jcrylequotes.com)

Multitudes on Mondays

Some of the biggest blessings are often the simplest, don’t you agree?

Mine from yesterday:

#26

Being able (barely) to stay awake during the message at church yesterday, even though I was so completely exhausted.

#27

Being served a hot meal by our church when we were so hungry and honestly, we didn’t know if we’d be able to afford any food.

#28

Having just a few minutes to rest my eyes before I had to continue with the day

#29

Spending time with my baby without any one else around, watching her play on the floor (and play in my knitting)

Today:

#30

Not feeling obligated to tackle the pile of laundry that is building

#31

Watching 3 of my kiddos excitedly open up Valentine’s from their grandparents, because getting mail is really that exciting to them!

#32

Spending time with the Lord, even if it’s while I’m sweating at the gym

Rooms to *live* in…a Pinterest post

Rooms to *live* in…

At this current time in our lives we are living in a space that we neither love nor hate. It’s a house, a place to keep warm, a place to lay our weary bodies and a place to eat a hot meal. We are truly blessed! Is it our ideal place? No.

We live in a tri-level house, built in the late 1970′s. So the main living area is on the main floor where the kitchen sort of “melts” into it, but not in a relaxing way. It’s pretty scrunched on this level, especially with four growing kiddos. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to live in a space where I am able to prepare meals while the kids are playing, doing homework or fighting loving each other within plain sight…preferably in an informal living room/family room, but our current situation is just way too small.

Now…while I didn’t specifially pin these photos onto Pinterest I did find the originating website from Pinterest.

(traditional family room design by atlanta general contractor Dresser Homes)

I love just about everything about this family room, including the calming colors and the wood accents. And look at that beautiful patio outside complete with a stone fireplace!

(traditional family room design by louisville design-build Michael Cadden . Promaster Design+Build)

What a warm space this is! I love the ceilings and everything about this design exudes comfort. I could imagine my family cuddling on the couches with a bowl of popcorn and a movie playing, while a fire is going in the fireplace.

(traditional family room design by minneapolis architect Murphy & Co. Design)

Everything about this exudes warmth too (especially the fire, right?). Love the wood beams and floors; the recessed, built-in bookshelves below the side windows are a nice touch.

My latest obsession…

wood dining tables with bench seating. What a great way for a larger family to gather and share a meal!

This reminds me of what Laura Ingalls Wilder’s kitchen would’ve looked like! I love the rustic nature of this whole room but particularly the table.

(from Burlap and Blue)

I wish I could find where this image originally came from! I love so many things about this room…the floors, the table (of course), the chalkboard wall and just the pure space to run!

I should’ve highlighted bedrooms, I am so tired from this last week…Happy {upcoming} Monday!

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• Intro to Pinterest (and Confessions of a Pinner) (findfocus.wordpress.com)